Mum was asleep the whole day today - her eyes did not open. She is looking very restful. Her heart is working overtime as various body functions shut down, but the result is that her cheeks have a warm glow, and she was looking very peaceful in bed. She was more unsettled a few days ago, as she waking frequently and occasionally calling out, as well as coughing.
We followed the suggestions of a number of people who have worked in palliative care by speaking with Mum individually to give her our blessings to move on; often people in this process can hold on for their family's sake. We first read some farewell messages that had been privately emailed and posted on the blog, and then each had some moments with her.
A nurse told us that with her current breathing pattern and other conditions, we were likely looking at 24 to 48 hours.
We apologize that we will not be able to call all of her many friends to personally inform them when she has passed, and know that it will doubtless be upsetting to read of it online. We know that it is coming, and simply wish for her to have a peaceful transition - it will be harder for those of us left behind.
At dinner tonight we talked about how quickly the change took place. Mark was visiting 4 weeks ago tonight, the day that Mum had the chemo treatment that would send her to hospital a few days later. That she managed to bounce back from that to be able to speak and spend quality time with us was a blessing, just as it was a blessing to have her in our lives to begin with. The kind words and support of her friends and family around the world throughout this process is evidence of how much she means to all of us, and we are grateful to all of you. Mum herself acknowledged how in this process she came to realize how much love she had around her.
11 comments:
thinking of you all god bless,
from susan ,john,daniel,emily,pauline, arnold,[family in yorkshire]
Dearest Marika,
The time to sleep peacefully has come. You have given your life and everyone in it all that one possibly could. Thank you for all that you are, for your friendship and your love. You will be in our hearts and minds forever, dear friend. Now it is time to rest. We love you, dearest Marika, Susan & John D.
Dearest Marika.... we miss you already. I refer to you as Mother Marika in our Studio Madrona group... you are the glue that holds us together! We hope to do you proud and continue as you did. We hung the show yesterday.. hope you would approve of the way it is done .... you always had some input. We are going in today because we know you would want is to get to it! Your messages here have been so inspirational and I have learned of your life before Victoria filled with friends, loved ones and family. You AND we have been blessed indeed. Go gently, and know that we are with you in spirit. Bug hugs, Bonny Myers
Dear Marianne, I wish you a gentle passing, the sound of the ocean, the song of the birds, our love and friendship, and we keep with us the memory of your vibrant spirit and generous heart. Love from Dana and Enn.
Dear Marika, Thank you for everything. Adieu. Love, Sandy Wallace
Dear Marika -- How many fond memories you've given me in the short time we've known each other -- thank you for everything.
'And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest.'
Love,
Katrin
Dear Marika,
Thank you for all you have given Mary and me and our family. Whether it was the excitement of the get-rich schemes of the Krones Investment Club (Mary), your support and friendship at UNBC (Peter) and beyond - and to all members of our family, our shared times on Christmas morning, simple walks or drinks or dinners, we miss all of this and more. These comments also apply to David as you know well. We miss you dreadfully already. Our love to you, David,Mark and Vicki,
Peter, Mary, Desmond, Fergus and Eilis
Dear Dear Marika,
I feel blessed to have known you this short while. As Bonny mentioned, your life before Victoria is represented by the many people who are leaving messages. You are well loved my dear. And for David, Vicky and Mark I wish for you as gentle a grieving as possible.
I hope you know you are loved and supported.
Marilyn
there are no words adequate. Blessings on you all.
love Lynn xo
I am thinking of you all. You are going through difficult days as I well know. The end does usually come peacefully as the morphine eases the pain - in David's case administered automatically in response to his body. The emotion are a roller-coaster of happy, sad and even feeling frustrated and angry but give Marika my love as I give it to you, and know that you will meet again.
Love Barbi
Wishing you all oases of peace in this important time. So glad you have each other and are surrounded by such love and care.
Love,
Michele Ley
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